Hanging on by a thread and a prayer

I'm still here just can't seem to put in to words my feelings with out falling apart. I am so tired. I feel like every step I take forward I get thrown back 10 feet. Frank's relentless badgering of me resulted in a phone number change and an upcoming trip to legal aid to file for a restraining order. I have gone out of my way to avoid confronting him. My heart tells me to mind my words and not speak the mean things over him that he has spoke into me. It's really hard. Since my last post He came into my house one night and tried to force himself on me but I was able to get him away and out of the house. And being stupid I didn't call the police. I don't want his stupid behavior now to effect his life forever. I am struggling to take the high road and not sink to his level. To add insult to injury I started getting this months utilities in and come to find out the money I had given him to pay bills last month he stashed away because he knew I was about to throw him out so I am stuck paying double bills.
My budget: $1100 income
$260 light bill
$136 cell phones
$138 Cable ( he just had to have the movie channels)
$142 water
$80 phone
$25 Internet
$ 75 gas
$200 probation ( for those who didn't know a stupid mistake i made)
Which leaves me a whole $44.00 for food and gas and the extras. and next week is my daughters birthday. When I think about where I allowed him to lead me I get so angry. Mostly at myself for allowing it to happen. I know God is my provider, Yet I still panic. And to think I still need to come up with a car. I have stared cutting back on all the extras that I can and pray we will see the effects in the next few months. I just have to be strong a little longer. On a positive note my house is finally starting to become mine again.
Thank you all for your prayers I would have never made it this far without them.
Love you all.